Ben Dover English Muffins 1 Official

So next time you’re at the store, don’t ask for the joke. Ask for Thomas’. Take them home. Treat them right. And when that first crunchy, buttery, nook-filled bite hits your tongue, you’ll realize: the only joke here is how long you’ve been eating boring toast.

The Ben Dover joke is old, lazy, and disrespectful to a breakfast icon that has shown up for us every single morning. The English muffin doesn’t need to be funny. It needs to be toasted. It needs to be buttered. And for the love of all that is holy, it needs to be fork-split . ben dover english muffins 1

But for years, thanks to a collective brain glitch and a middle school level of humor, half of America has called them “Ben Dover” English muffins. Say it fast. "Got any Ben Dover muffins?" You laugh. You point. You feel clever. Meanwhile, the actual English muffin sits on the shelf, weeping buttery tears, wondering why it gets dragged into a pun war. So next time you’re at the store, don’t ask for the joke

In Defense of the English Muffin (And Why You’ve Been Saying “Ben Dover” Your Whole Life) Treat them right

Let’s get one thing straight right now. I am not talking about a gentleman from across the pond who performs questionable comedy routines. I am talking about —the nookiest, cranniest, most unfairly slandered bread product in the history of the breakfast aisle.